I can wait for a lot things. I don’t need to buy a piece of clothing the minute that I like it. I can wait until I have the funds or until I lose weight. I don’t need to see a movie the day it comes out because people say it is a great movie. I can wait to see it on Pay Per View.
But when it comes to weight loss, I want INSTANT GRATIFICATION!
Yes, in that area I am like the new generation–I WANT IT NOW!!!!!!
I see my goal–which is a huge number by the way–and it just seems impossible. Also depressing, is that I never buy new clothes because I don’t lose the weight.
The experts tell me to find other ways to show I have succeeded other than weight loss on the scale.
They tell me to notice how my clothes feel on me. They should feel looser, they say. No, doesn’t work for me, they still feel tight. I think I was being delusional for a long time in thinking that my weight wasn’t that bad. I will have to lose a lot more for me to notice it in my clothes and besides, I have been wearing these clothes for 15 years, and because I have lost and gained and lost and gained about a thousand times they are stretched to my size.
I have put a lot of thought in this. I want to see and feel real progress.
They told me I lost 4 pounds, but I don’t see it, I don’t feel it.
So, I decided I would put one pound stones in a bag for each pound lost. I have to get a huge number of stones and I really don’t want to take my food scale to the beach to weigh a thousand stones to find 50–lets start there–that weigh exactly one pound.
There has to be an easier way. So, I head to the pantry, where I always head when I have a dilemma. But this time I wasn’t searching for snacks. I was searching for something that weighs exactly one pound. I thought a can of soup would work–nope–1.02 pounds. Bummer. How about some black beans–nope–again 1.02 lb. Green beans also disappointed me with a 1.01 lb weight.
You know, when you get really desperate for something, you start pushing food around, hoping there will be a treasure somewhere behind the healthy food.
Yes, I found it! It was exactly 1.0 POUND!
Ok, I found a pound can, but what am I going to do with a million cans of hummus?
Then it hit me. I will see and feel how much I lost and then when I have reached my goal, I will donate these to a food bank or charity. I will feel physically, mentally and emotionally good about myself.
Talk to you later, because now I am off to buy lots and lots of alwadi hummus.