Weighty Problems Chapter


It was a beautiful New Years Day in Carlsbad. The sun was shining and it was a warm 70 degrees–a perfect day for a bike ride. I am a biker–no not that kind of a biker, I am a bicyclist. I am over 21–waaaaaay over 21 and this is one activity that I truly enjoy. The doctors tell me that it is the best thing for my arthritic knees. My Number One man and I had biked this route before and my bike moved along like rain on glass. It was so smooth and easy. Not that I would admit to being competitive, but I left my Number One guy in the dust. He would be huffing and puffing behind me and I was a little smug and happy to be the leader of the pack–vroom, vroom!

We proudly packed the bikes on the bright, red, car and drove the long mile to the beach where we could ride the relatively flat surface of the coast highway. We knew we were not in good enough shape to bike the mountain sized hills from our home to the beach. Of course, I never travel light, even when I am biking. I have my camel-bak backpack filled with 32 ounces of water, my wallet that carries too much loose change, a snack for both Number One and myself, a 16 ounce bottle of water for Number One and various lotions and gums.

It hadn’t been a few months, it had been months and months since we had ridden our bikes and it was for a lot of reasons, but the main one being we didn’t have a rack for the bikes and Number One did not want to scratch his red car. While we were not riding, life, work, stress, and grown children were a part of our lives. I handle stress well. Everyone thinks I am so calm and nothing bothers me. My tried and true method for IMMEDIATE stress relief is that I just keep pushing more and more food into my mouth to push down all my feelings of stress and hurt. It works!


Yes, it does have a few drawbacks. One, I am not truly dealing with my problems and ALL my problems show up on my body. A bulge in the hips. Oh my goodness, two tummy rolls! A derriere that could mimic the trunk of a car, four chins, and a bust that everyone lovingly calls my “shelf.” It was the holidays. I knew I had gained some weight, but I also knew that I could not–or would not–do anything about it until the holidays were over.


So, back to the ride that has always been relaxing and fun. Number One is usually a half mile behind me as soon as I hit the street. Today, he was on my tail. He was so close I thought he was going to kiss my back tire. Then–OMG–he passed me!!! He passed me easily. He passed me and was moving far ahead of me. My legs kept pushing, but the wind was affecting me so much more than it was affecting him. Now, he was a good half mile ahead of me. He rounded the bend and I couldn’t even see him. How could this be happening? He was supposed to be behind me. What was wrong?


Number One stopped and waited for me because I was moving so slowly. Smart man–he did not say a word. I am sure he was thinking all kinds of things, but he did not voice them. We arrived at our destination–Starbucks. Of course, since we exercised we deserved a treat. So, coffee, chai latte and brownies were the pick of the day. Once we rested we started back.


How had the wind changed directions? The wind had been coming from the north and that was the reason I was moving so slowly. But now it was coming from the south. Each time my foot put pressure on the pedal, it seemed like I was on a stationary bike. I pushed and pushed and was huffing and puffing along. The worst part was the Number One passed me again and was far ahead–AGAIN. There is a long, steep hill on the way home. I mean really steep and way too long of a hill that leads up to Pelican Point. This hill was always a challenge, but that day my heart was pounding so hard I thought it was trying to work its way out of my chest, and my face was overheated. I could feel my pulse in my ears. (If a doctor is reading this, I think I had my heart stress test and survived–thank God!)

I geared down and geared down and geared down until I could not gear down anymore, but I still needed to find some lower gears. The climb up the hill was long, painful and demoralizing. There was no way I was going to get off my bike and walk. I HAD to make it to the top. I got there! Frustratingly, Number One was peacefully and calmly sitting at the top waiting for me to reach him.


At the top of the hill I made my decision. I was going to do something about it and would do it tomorrow!


Weight Loss is a journey of many chapters. I will continue each chapter of my weight loss struggle on my “Losing It” page.

Posted in Losing It.

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